Friday, October 31, 2014

Friday Vlog: When Sharon Met Dale the Doll

Thursday, October 30, 2014

Proof Dolls Are Evil

Royal De Luxe (my favorite of the performance arts troups)

Brothers Quay (my favorite creepy stop-motion films)

(Marionettes are always creepy)

Ventriloquist dolls are perhaps the most disturbing. 

Regular dolls are not much better.

John Carpenter: The King Of Halloween

(Today's post is by a special guest author, Jared Hill

The director John Carpenter was behind several of the most iconic movies released during the 1970s and 80s, which was something of a golden era for horror cinema. Some notable films were Halloween, The Fog and The Thing, and these horror flicks still represent the hallmark of his work, even after a few decades without a new Carpenter film. But, the director’s work extends beyond the horror genre and has made its mark on the film industry as a whole.

Starting out with Carpenter’s big hits, Halloween has to rank near the top of the list. The first film of this series pretty much set the tone for a huge onslaught of 80s horror films yet to come. Just the sheer power of the character of Michael propelled studios to come up with a number of similar characters for the horror film genre, such as Jason in the Friday the 13th series, among others.

While Halloween did get inspiration from scary movies from the past, Carpenter’s movie The Thing basically re-envisioned a classic horror movie in a new setting with a more psychological bent. This time, scientists in Antarctica slowly lose their grip on reality while dealing with an unknown creature that makes them doubt each other as much as they fear their dark, desolate surroundings. This added psychological horror surpassed the typical jump-out-of-your-seat antics of many horror movies.

A final highlight in Carpenter’s filmography is The Fog. Carpenter decided to embed this story in the tradition of scary stories told by the campfire to make it come to life a little more. This background imbues the movie with a sense of supernatural forces from the past coming to wreak havoc in the present day. The original idea stemmed from Carpenter's visit to Stonehenge, which evoked ideas about the strange, lifelike fog there.

Movies from the later part of Carpenter’s career met with mixed success and made financiers turn a cold shoulder to his projects. Escape from L.A. touched on some social commentary in a sci-fi context and Memoirs of an Invisible Man tied comic undertones into a tale of government wrongdoing in a sci-fi context. Both films failed at the box office and neither managed to gain a fan following after the fact.

That being said, a few of his movies didn't get the praise they truly deserved upon release and have now achieved cult status. In They Live, Carpenter leads viewers on a satirically self-aware romp through the more conspiratorial edges of the sci-fi genre. Two other underestimated Carpenter movies cap off his Apocalypse Trilogy and focus on mass psychology and vulnerability of the mind. First, The Prince of Darkness merges occult themes with sci-fi ideas to concoct a terrifying evil force that is set on overtaking an entire population for its malevolent purposes. The final installment, In the Mouth of Madness, examines how ideas from books or other media might horribly alter the behavior of those who consume them.

Most recently, Carpenter contributed to the Masters of Horror series on Showtime with Cigarette Burns, the eighth installment of the series. The series, despite . In this episode, he again takes on the idea of how something larger than a single person, like a movie, might affect large numbers of people. The 2011 movie The Ward takes viewers directly into a mental institution, but with a supernatural twist to add to the torment of the protagonist and the viewer alike. The film continues to carry on Carpenter’s tradition of psychological thrillers and is easily available through platforms like Amazon Prime, Netflix and Direct TV.

While neither of these last few efforts really spoke to fans or critics, John Carpenter’s place in the history of cinema remains significant. The memorable scenes from his horror movies continue to send chills down spines. But, it is his ability to blend deeper social, psychological and even existential questions into multiple genres will define his legacy as a filmmaker.

How Much Sex Does It Take To Burn Off Halloween Candy Calories?

I was casually wondering about the calories in Halloween candy and then, since I'm strictly dieting, I wondered how is the best way to work it off. Then, I thought about how chocolate is the love medicine for women. So, how much sex would it take to burn off those fun-sized bars???

(Fun sized bars):

Snickers (80 calories) 15 minutes of foreplay followed by *10 minutes of intercourse

Milky Way (75 calories) 15 minutes of kissing followed by *7 minutes of intercourse

Baby Ruth (85 calories) 15 minutes of kissing followed by *5 minutes of foreplay followed by *10 minutes of intercourse

Tootsie Pop (60 calories) *10 minutes of intercourse

Reese’s cup (44 calories) *7 minutes of intercourse OR 20 minutes of foreplay

M&M fun size little bag (99 calories) *15 minutes of intercourse or 45 minutes of foreplay

1 roll Smarties (25 calories) 15 minutes of kissing

*You can half your intercourse time if you use the doggy style position because it burns twice as many calories (wink).

Now, considering the amount of candy one typically finishes off while waiting for the little boogers to knock at the door, it seems Halloween should be accompanied by bottles of Viagra and a crate of KY jelly on the Halloween display stand in the stores.

Warning: Enjoy in moderation (the candy, not the sex!)

Wednesday, October 29, 2014

Meet Me, Julie (and Dale the Doll) At Phoenix FearCon!

This coming weekend, Julie Ferguson and I will be at Phoenix FearCon.  We will be bringing Dale along!  We have a book signing table with tons of books and lots of abandoned location atmosphere. Please come by and visit! We love to meet our horror-loving, para-geek friends!

We will also be going to the Halloween Ball on Halloween Night as part of the VIPs for the event. I will go as a pirate wench and Julie is going as a 1980s rocker chick. Dale the Doll, however, is not invited to that event!


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