Monday, June 20, 2011

"Paranormal Challenge" Reviewed


So, Zak Baggy Pants started another show. There is something to be said about his ambition, but even more to be said about his lack of creativity.

The show puts together two teams that are pitted against each other to get "evidence" of a haunting in a famously haunted location.

I won't even comment on how lame and boring it was or how funny it is to hear Zak try to speak like a grownup and act like he knows what he's talking about.

I hated the show. In fact, like the godawful "Haunted Collector," you will not hear me review or plug the show again.

If someone sent me in to salvage the show (the only way I'd ever see it again), I would tell them--you're doing it all wrong!

Here's some things that could perhaps revive the show:

Set up something that will make a shadow or a phantom sound and see which team debunks it.

Set a team of psychics against a team of traditional ghost hunters and see if there's any advantage.

Let the teams bring their own tools and use their own techniques. It could be more fun to see them trying out some crazy shit and having some strange methods.

I don't know what to say, Zak, except just go back to being the ghost tormentor that we enjoy chuckling at. Go ahead, get all hyped up and scream like a girl. Be sure and say the wrong things. Work that mop on your head into some gelled gem. Just, please, do not think of syndicating. Make your extra bucks promoting t-shirts and making people pay to hunt with you around the country. Give up on having an original thought. It's this thing called the Peter Principle. Check it out some time. Oh, hell, I'm not sure you understand research (the incubus incident and all), so let me tell you, "In a hierarchy every employee tends to rise to his level of incompetence."

13 comments:

  1. Well, I'm glad you didn't comment on how lame and boring it was - that would be beneath you, no matter how silly it was to hear Zak trying to speak like a grownup. It's nice to know some people still have integrity. (LOL!)

    I guess once someone has their foot in the proverbial door of fame, it's easy for them to parlay a lack of talent into a continuing series of disappointments.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I saw the beginning and end. Guess I didn't miss much. :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Eric;
    Yes. You'd think when you figure out the secret to success, it shouldn't be that hard to maintain it with the same vigor with which you attained it to begin with, but some people just glide.

    Pangs;
    Yeah, you're fucking brilliant, my friend. I had to sit through the whole thing just so I could write this little bit of witticism and hopefully protect others from mental and emotional abuse of sitting through an episode.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I sincerely tried to watch it the other night, but it struck me as too much of a "market expansion" as opposed to a project sincerely designed to find the truth behind some things.

    And it's a competition? How does that work?

    I ended up turning it off about a quarter the way through and firing up the BBC documentary on something more interesting.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Aaron, you're brilliant! If I didn't want to give it a shot and report about it, I would have drilled a hole in my head and watched the blood spurt out and be more entertained. Zak is great at being a douche-bag yelling at the ghosts in a dark building, but he is no Bob Barker and it is so stilted, so wrong that it's like seeing Santa Claus try to peddle cars on a used car lot--it's just wrong, wrong, wrong.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Just you wait, mark my words....

    One day there WILL be a show called "Dancing to The Next Paranormal Extreme Makeover Challenge of the Stars"

    Then the 1st Horseman will begin his ride...

    ReplyDelete
  7. I'm glad I wasn't the only one who hated the show....it's so insanely staged.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I only watched a couple of GA episodes before deciding that Zak could keep that show. The idea of a competition in this field is so ludicrous that I am surprised Autumn made it through the whole thing. Zak needs to go into an active poltergeist situation and use taunting there. Humility will ensue shortly thereafter.

    Storm

    ReplyDelete
  9. Storm;
    Truly. I look back at their documentary that started the show and the supposed poltergeist event with the brick and the board flying and him screaming like a girl and jumping out the window. I love how he taunts the dead. He's like a high school bully stealing milk money from kindergarten kids. He never gets evidence (I will not count his hokey class c EVPs) and there's a good reason. He's a dick. I admit that GA cracks me up and I watch it purely for the comedy content. They finally caught on that they are hilarious to people and so they play it up. I suppose it says something for his intelligence that he caught on that he's a joke. So, now with him trying to be serious it's just wrong, wrong, wrong.

    ReplyDelete
  10. He looks a little creepy in that pic.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Deep Thinker;
    Yeah, he looks like he just shit on someone's shoe.

    ReplyDelete
  12. We get a huge kick out of Ghost Adventures and were excited to have a look at the new show. We lasted 15 minutes and probably should have turned the channel at 5.

    ReplyDelete
  13. MM;
    Seriously. TV these days thinks "if they like the Kardashians, they'll like each sibling to have their own fucking banal show." We like Zak, but only in the context of a pumped up frat-type boy waving his arms at ghosts and yelling and running and screaming.

    ReplyDelete

LinkWithin

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...