Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Is Bigfoot a Berry Crack Whore?


On a funny note, with the BF hunt coming up, I made the team homemade Bigfoot footprint marshmallows to put in their hot cocoa. I'm officially an UBER DORK!





Tonight, I'm heading over to a talk given by a crypto dude talking about AZ Bigfoot and since in a few days I'm heading on a BF expedition in AZ, I figured--what great timing! Now, I'm contemplating the object of my obsession. Seriously, I think it's bordering on stalking Bigfoot. Perhaps I need a boyfriend! Well, anyways, I thought I'd repost a theory of mine. Enjoy!

Okay, so maybe I spend too much time contemplating weird things. I mentioned this theory to a dear friend in the field of BF hunting and he seemed to be pleased with the notion, so maybe I wasn't too off the mark.

Is Bigfoot a Berry Crack Whore?

It started out with me seeing a show where monkeys were stealing beers from local diners somewhere in the world. Can't recall where, but I'll take a wild stab it might have been India or Indonesia. Anyhow, the monkeys were hooked. I remembered as a kid, my father was in the alcohol recovery business, putting in programs around the world. One time, he mentioned a study done on monkeys that showed that they become hooked on alcohol just like humans, that they even would eat overripe berries that had fermented to get a buzz.

Then, my mind went to the tendency for man and ape to apparently like to get high and I wondered about Bigfoot. He would certainly fall victim to the same desire. If BF is eating a serious shitload of overly ripe berries at the end of season, might he take more risks to get his buzz? Might he wander out where he's seen more often? Might he be seen more often because his inhibitions diminish and his guard isn't up? So, the only thing left of researchers is to see if he is sighted more often during the time of year that local berries are overly ripe on the vine. It might even help them figure out more accurately where he's traveling along the countryside as he follows the ripening berries and narrow the field of possible locations at any given time of the year.

Of course, the notion of Bigfoot puking on his buddies and mooning the crowd in the thick of heavy drinking is entertaining, but I am definitely on the run should he decide he can do Karoke. I must draw the line with BF's rendition of "Every Rose Has its Thorns."

That said, what do y'all think? Theory has merit or not?


2 DAYS UNTIL THE BLOGGER VIRTUAL ZOMBIE WALK ONLINE EVENT!

14 comments:

  1. damn it big foot! you need to lay off them berries man. lol.

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  2. Place a bottle of berry wine in the wilderness, and wait. Boom! Instant BF trap!

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  3. i can see bigfoot with a rasberry stain around there noses lol joking a lil

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  4. We are going to have to make a berry offering for the hairy beast. Perhaps he can party with us. Looking forward to the trip.

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  5. The first step is admitting you have a problem.

    No, I'm not talking about Bigfoot and the crack berries, I'm talking about AutumnForest being an ÖÜber Dork!

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  6. I figure if I'm going to be a dork, I might be an uber spaz too!

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  7. Right! If you're gonna do something, do it Über.

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  8. The berry theory sounds logical to me. I've seen footage of monkeys stealing drinks from people at beach resorts - like you, I can't remember exactly where.

    I don't think making Bigfoot footprint marshmallows is dorky at all. I think it's cute!!

    Have a great time on your expedition.

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  9. I love that theory. There are also any number of bird that will chow down on overly ripe berries in our neck of the wood and catch a bit of a buzz.

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  10. You know, MM, I remember one time the birds in my mom's yard eating pyracanthia berries (I thought they were poisonous?) But, they started dancing on the ground all goofy like and falling into the pool and I sat there with a pole and net, pulling them out over and over again until they sobered up. It was the most insane scene I've ever seen.

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    Replies
    1. LOL Good one. What you need is some of my Grandpa's homemade strawberry,raspberry or blackberry wine. It must have been pretty good because it was kept in the shed and he spent a lot of time going in and out of that shed and was always happy when doing so. Even the neighbors liked to visit that shed...LOL

      and no I don't think the marshmallow footprints are dorky at all...

      I do hope you'll tell us more about your Bigfoot lecture and expedition.

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    2. Hey Blondie; Yes, I do like elderberry wine and dandelion too. I actually did get myself buzzed as a kid on the berries, not knowing at the time what caused it. I will be doing a post next week about a BF talk I'm going to by some NM researchers. I also plan to do some hunts this summer and will report and vlog about those, no doubt. If you hit my Bigfoot button at the top of the blog-you'll find some other interesting posts like Bigfoot's letter to Humans and "Bigfoot: Do My Genes Make My Butt Look Human?"

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    3. Thanks I'll go do that now.
      Take care. I don't want to hear on the news "Redhead seen being carried off by Bigfoot holding a jug of fruit wine". ;)

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