Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Bigfoot, My Furry-Butted Relative

(photo above; hopefully the only way we'll ever capture Bigfoot--as a plastic doll)

Sure, I hunt ghosts, but I also have a fascination for Bigfoot. I haven’t had a personal encounter with him like I have with ghost phenomenon, but still for some weird unexplainable reason, I have always believed he is out there. It’s a strange feeling, as if I’ve been separated from a twin at birth. I sense he exists, I feel as if my life is being paralleled, and I also know that when I come face-to-face with him, my world will change and I’ll have a sudden sense of peace, as if everyone is accounted for in my family tree.

People often say, “if Bigfoot is out there, we should be seeing him, seeing his bones, seeing his hiding places.” I don’t know about them, but I’ve lived in the desert Southwest since 1977 and I’ve tried desperately to see a javelina without success. I guess I could say that until I see one, they don’t exist. It’s kind of like ghosts, until you encounter the unexplained, it doesn’t exist. I suppose Bigfoot skeptics will have to be faced with his hairy butt in some thick forest before they’ll say what others who’ve come across him have said, “what the hell was that?

What would keep such a population alive so long would surely be a social grouping. Look at apes and chimps, they have an extended family they live amongst. They breed within the group, they live within the group, they forage for food within the group. Bigfoot cannot be a loner and breed. He must have his own suburbia. I think it would be against his very nature as a primate not to. I also think that, like the Great Ape, he would know how to hide up in the hillside for as long as possible before being found. Some locals might report such a hairy creature for centuries before someone stumbles upon his family’s hideout. Apparently, Bigfoot is still in the legend status as the Great Ape once was. We no longer deny the Great Ape because the locals told stories of him without proof of his existence. This is simply a matter of time and tenacity until we get the real in-the-flesh proof that science and humanity demand.

I personally don’t want to see Bigfoot’s future go the way of the Great Ape. I’m not paying admission to a zoo to see him pacing a big iron cage and being taunted by teens in baggy pants tossing popcorn at him.

My advice, my big cousin, is to continue to find those reaches in the Washington State Mountains and Oregon hillsides where you’ll best protect your family. Don’t do anything stupid one night like eat too many psychedelic mushrooms and stumble onto a roadway to be plowed down by a family’s SUV. Whatever you’re doing, keep it up. Don’t be found. Don’t prove yourself to the satisfaction of us who have always believed in you.

In the long run, prove you’re equally as smart as man because you now what capture means. Hide your furry butt someone where the sun don’t shine and stay icy. Leave only enough evidence to scare off the weak-willed and remind those who believe that their brother is still in the woods.

But, whatever you do, please remain an intriguing legend.

p.s. Thanks for the Patterson-Gimlin home movies, bro, it’s the only way I have to remember you.


  1. There are just so many sightings of bigfoot to discount its exsistance. I am also very fascinated by bigfoot and love watching all the documentaries on that subject. I still say that it is a clever beast, keeping one step ahead of those hunting them.

  2. Yeah, he just makes me smile. I adore those commercials they had of messing with Sasquatch. I think it's really the reverse, though. I think he likes to just screw with us and then take off, have a laugh with the family back at the cave, and shake his fist in the air every time a plane flies over. :-)

  3. I'm fascinated by Bigfoot too. I like anything that's a good mystery.

  4. I agree. I hope he is never caught. People are constantly talking about how to kill one if they can just get a shot at him. I think it would be considered murder no matter what they say. I say to him live free and try to stay free. I will never tell on him. :)

  5. I agree with mike and julie that there are far too many sightings to have nothing behind this phenomena-still feeling pretty lousy -was trying to go round web and alerting bloggers i thought my be interested to Terence Mckennas video that Christopher has up at the secret sun blog-it was worth watching every 42 minutes to me-best as always hope i dont sound stupid still on that nitetime cough syrup crap and it makes me so slow-all the best!!

  6. For me Bigfoot represents the thrill and excitement of a new discovery, the chance that maybe, just maybe, there are some things about the way the world works that are completely unexpected.

    And I too hope they never find him.

    By the way does anyone else think that the statue at the top of the post looks a bit like Fisto from the old He-Man cartoon?


    No? Just me then.

  7. Devin; Take care of yourself and get better! There are some great teas you can make from things around the house that help congestion a lot. I like to use rosemary tea myself and add some ginger, lemon, and honey. That's my head-cold combo. I'll checkout the video. Yeah, I think when you get this many people and this many foot castings of a creature, you're getting the hints of something lurking. Hope he continues to lurk.

    Gee; I thought Fisto looked like a viking in the cartoon, but the doll version does kind of remind me of my Bigfoot doll. I love my Bigfoot doll because it can make footprints with his feet in ink. It's hilarious! That's the only way I mind having Bigfoot marketed.

  8. Devin;
    Just wanted to say,I saw that "McKenna `N Me" video. Wow! I wish I had been in the audience during that one. Some lectures you just want to hear live. I have always tended to lean towards the time travel explanation with UFOs, just because of the accounts of fascination with DNA (cattle, human abductions) and because of the lack of trying to communicate with us and their curiosity about missile silos and such. I loved that he had lots of interesting options for UFO phenomenon. I've often wondered myself if what we're seeing in the sky actually has dimension and physicality or if it's a glimmer of something that was there or will be there or is in another dimension and for some reason the sky allows for perfect conditions to view, sort of like northern lights... Hmm. Thanks for the heads up on the video