Saturday, March 26, 2011
(one of my early paintings in the mid 80s--how I saw the beach where I lived)
When my ex would come home from work, he would begin with the criticisms immediately. He'd grumble about the traffic, complain that the neighbor's tree was growing over the property, point out the dust ball in the far corner of the kitchen where no one ever went, tell me that the food smelled like I put onions in it, did I put onions in it?
By the time he actually got into the meal that was awaiting him on the table, he would have voiced on average 5 complaints. No "hello, honey" or kiss. No sense of he's glad to be home. Never asked how my day was. Completely self-absorbed and tightly wound.
When I came home, I saw my haven, my family, and wanted to know all about their days. On the road, I dodged the stupid drivers and sang to the radio. I genuinely cared how my family's day went.
What you focus on, your world becomes.
Do you find what's deficient in your day? How other people are doing things the stupid way, getting in your way, not being nice to you? Do you assign fault and blame? Do you worry constantly about the outcomes of everything?
Your reality becomes; defensiveness, anger, frustration, hopelessness, helplessness and fear.
When I'm working on Blogger and inevitably things get all fucked up, I chuckle. Oh, jeez, it's being Blogger again! It's almost endearing. I know eventually I'll get it fixed and I'm not getting a final grade in college, so what do I care? I'll just patiently go at it and learn something new. Everything is a new adventure, a new skill, and always something to laugh at later.
My reality becomes; curiosity, humor, patience, confidence and passion.
What you focus on, becomes your reality.
So, what are you focusing on all day long?
at 3:30 AM