Lonely on a Friday Night? Join Us!



I'm in all evening, y'all. Jump on and say hi, hangout, chit chat, tell jokes, explain what you're drinking and why, comment on repeats of Ghost Adventures. Whatever you want. The minute you jump on, I'll know. Just shout out a "howdy." Here something to make you smile or cringe.\

Comments

  1. Hey, what's up for your weekend?

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  2. My, what an odd thing to have happen to your vacuum cleaner. Glad to be here!

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  3. Hey HN;
    Yeah, I didn't think about what a shedding cat I am. I had to cut all that hair out of there. It could have made some poor redhead a nice wig.

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  4. It's funny at my mom's house, the real shedding is problem is my yellow lab, not the two cats. But then, their both short-hairs.

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  5. Oh, I love yellow labs! And chocolate ones too, but I love the yellow ones because they remind me of golden retrievers. How cute! I can imagine that wearing black clothing-probably not a good option there.

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  6. Oh, black's not an option around Shelli (that's my dog's name).
    Anywho, got any adventures in the making this weekend, Autumn?

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  7. I wish I did, HN. It's in the mid to upper 80s and I have spring fever. Just planted tons of herbs on my patio. Gotta work tomorrow. Bummer. Sunday I have the day off but I bet you know what I'm doing? Writing! I'm editing my novella "Deadwood Mesa" the one about the undead cowboy and the vampires in the ghost town's mines. I'm putting it up next on ebooks. I needed a break from nonfiction. I'll finish up my book on psychics after that and then I'm revamping that short story of the clown and the woman at the carnival who was afraid of clowns that had to ride the ferris wheel with him. I want to make it into a novella about fear of clowns. Love the twist ending.

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  8. Yeah, I've got Spring Fever here too! It feels like late Spring, it's so unseasonably warm here in the Ohio wasteland. I'll be working on the budget for the Isla Corpus haunt tonight and tomorrow.

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  9. HN;
    I hope you can scavenge for parts. It sounds like a lot of what you're doing you can prepare with things like thrift store sheets or even yards of muslin you can get at the fabric store for like 99 cents a yard. I tea stained mine and tore it up to make it look like tattered sales. You can also use styrofoam for parts too and make your own half glue/half water and newspaper strips paper maiche. Oh, I love doing this stuff! Oh, and in the jewelry dept at the craft stores they have bags of fake jewels.

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  10. Just wanted to hop on and say Hi. How's it going Autumn? Long time no talk.:)

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  11. Hey Reid! How's it going buddy? I'm doing well.

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  12. I gonna see if I can't acquire chocolate coins for the ToT's "Treasure" in a chest I own. Maybe mix it with Mardi Gras beads for extra details.

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  13. HN;
    Now you're talking. I've even seen in the thrift stores those beaded doorway curtains like from the hippie era--lots of beads to fall off those if you cut them open. Put lots of filler beneath it with newspaper and cover it a shining gold piece of fabric and any jewels and coins atop of it will look like a big pile of them.

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  15. Sorry to cut this short, but I just remembered I've got to do the dishes. Have a good one, Autumn!

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  16. Hey, Autumnforest!
    when there's good wind tunnel it can get pretty twisted.

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  17. You have the same problem, Echo? I find my hairs everywhere. It's ridiculous. I actually put it in a ponytail while I sleep because otherwise if I roll over, it can wrap around my neck and choke me.

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  18. It's going pretty well. School finally loosened its noose for the weekend, which is nice considering I am also finally recovering from the flu, haha. What are you up to this fine friday?

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  19. You poor lad. You need to get your flu shot when you're in college--you will always get it and at a time when you need to do midterms. Silly boy! I just finished a work day and am ready to put on some movies, but what??? I don't know what I'm in the mood for. Did you change your major are you still in the same one?

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  20. Haha yeah I know I sould go get it one of these days. What doesnt kill me makes me stronger right? You watch Apocalypse Now! As I am probably going to be watching that later this evening.:P

    I'm still in the same major, Psychology. This semester has just been so much busier than last, Haha.

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  21. I hope you're managing to get in some social life too and some WRITING!! (that's a demand). I published 2 ebooks and have another coming out in about a month. Pretty cool, huh?

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  22. Oh really? Where do I get myself a copy of your books?

    Haha, yeah I am trying to keep up my writing. Been writing a bit lately. Lost my inspiration for a bit,found ny world very void of stuff to write about. Lol, lucky I'm over that (I hope?) :P

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  23. When it thaws out in the spring, you'll be inspired anew. My books are on Kindle and Nook (Amazon and Barnes and Noble) and they can be downloaded to the computer as well as readers and droids and ipads and all that other techno crap.
    "Was That a Ghost?" (tells you how to figure out if you encountered the paranormal) and "Abandoned Places: Abandoned Memories (Desert Edition)" that is photography of abandoned places, along with my psychic reads of a moment in their past and a person who was associated with it.

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  24. Oh sweet! Congrats Darling! I will definitely be checking those out. I'm glad you finally finished them and for the published.

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  25. Thanks Reid. I had a lot of books I was sitting on and now that I'm a freebird, I have the time to work on them. I have a book coming out probably in May/June for people who want to develop their psychic abilities "From Fledgling to Full-Fledged Psychic" and working on research on a ground-breaking one about why some buildings are haunted and others are not--even with similar histories inside them. I also am working on a midlife lifestyle makeover book and a divorcee's book that will be humorous called "Luv Ya/Love You."

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  26. That's so awesome,Sharon. I'm so excited for you. I wish I had some news like that to share after my disappearance, but all I for a is doing well in school :P. I'm stoked to read your stuff though.

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  27. Reid;
    I think you'll like them both for different reasons. Writing up psychic reads was really amazing for me and cathartic. I usually retain them in my head, but to let them spill out into written word was liberating. Just a moment in time and some very interesting people I captured. My heart went into the ghost one because it's not only the way I've handled ghost hunting and helping and counseling folks, but I got to expose my methodology. If I had a legacy in the GH world, it would be my blog and that book. It says it all.

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  28. Oh totally. I mean they both touch many people. I dont think some one could ask for a better legacies.

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  29. Well, I like to think my brilliant son is my best legacy, but next to that, my ability to communicate and have a different outlook about the paranormal and an intact sense of humor and counseling skills--those are my secondary legacy. So, talking about legacies, you simply must, must promise me you will free up your soul to write more. At least keep a journal. Your skills are outrageously awesome.

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  30. Anyone watching Ghost Adventures tonight?

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  31. Barry;
    I plan to when it comes on. Which episode is on there now?

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  32. Alright, I promise you I will. I do usually keep and write in a journal but for you i promise I will write more.

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  33. You have such a rare insight and way to express it. I think it correlates well with your major. They go hand-in-hand. You are very empathic. In fact, in my psychic book, that would be your fledgling category. :-)

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  34. I think they said Preston Castle its a boys reform school. Next will be Yorktown Texas.

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  35. Oh good. Those are two I don't recall so I must not have paid much attention.

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  36. Yorktown is a new episode. They must be hurting for ratings Zak takes his shirt off lol

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  37. Freaking hell??? A new episode and no one told me??? What is wrong with Travel Channel? I don't trust them anymore.

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  38. Thank you Sharon :) that made me blush. I wish i could watch Ghost Adventures with you guys. No cable :(

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  39. Reid;
    It's probably better for you brilliant brain if you do not corrupt it with Zak Bagans, but if you find it necessary to dabble, I think they have some episodes on Travel Channel's site. :-)

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  40. uh oh somebody didn't get a chance to set up her drinking game lol

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  41. I know--or pick a music video. Jeez!!!

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  42. Hey;
    I'm guessing it's almost as hot in Tucson as it is in Phoenix. Argh! It's too early for this heat.

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  43. I think it was around 87 today. Supposed to cool down this week, though.

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  44. I heard perhaps rain on Monday. What is rain? I don't believe it exists. Hey, I hear there are tours of a titan missile silo down there including moonlight ones. Have your heard about that?

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  45. Oh yeah...they've been doing those for years. I've never been, but I think it would be eerie/interesting.

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  46. I have a buddy down there and he is always doing such fun things! Loads of new-age types of meetup groups and cool events and then being closer to Tombstone and Bisbee-very cool. They also have an airplane junkyard there that gives tours. How creepy! Do you do lots of outdoors stuff?

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  47. OUTDOORS...love it. Like to hike and camp, play a little tennis--stuff like that. I've been to that airplane graveyard...really cool.

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  48. bon soir... ce vas? ;) lol

    being older'n dirt, i'm soon off to bed! :P

    ...it's nearly 11 pm, and i get up before 6... dog duty and all that....

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  49. I love hiking. My buddy got me to do it again and I hadn't since I had my achilles tendon reattached. It didn't go so well so the whole leg is rather numb and weird and I have to wear a bit of a heel to walk well, but when he got me hiking for hours at a time and climbing stuff, I realized I could handle more than I thought. I so love it. I'm not great with camping because of allergies and because I never feel safe in a tent asleep while strangers wander around, also scared of bears. heehee. I love tennis, haven't played it in years but I was very proficient at it. I don't think I could do that with the achilles, but I still love to shoot baskets, another favorite thing.

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  50. LW;
    You take care, my friend and get a good night's sleep. But, I thought wolves tended to run around at night???

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  51. Shooting baskets--allright! I'll tell you what's worse than bears in a campground, and that's SKUNKS! I got up in the middle of the night one time and sat down at the picnic table near my tent and then saw a skunk sitting about 20 feet away from me. He didn't move, and I SURE wasn't gonna move! We sat that way for maybe an hour. Man, I was freaked out!

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  52. Hahaha. I can picture that. I would too. I think I would become a statue! I got sprayed as a kid and I swear it was in my nostrils for a month! I used to hike in the Sierras up to like 11K feet to glacial lakes and such and when we camped for the night, I never slept one wink. I thought for sure I was in Bigfoot territory. I'd listen to ever sound. I was miserable and I got altitude sickness and my eyes swelled shut and I was vomiting. It was not pretty. No more altitudes. My gal pals and I want to rent a cabin in Greer and do some bigfoot hunting just for kicks. I promised I'd make hemp brownies and see if that might bring him out. Whatcha think? Bigfoot with the munchies might not be a good thing, huh?

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  53. I dunno if it will bring Bigfoot out, but it will bring me out!

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  54. Hahaha. Yeah, I figured if we can't entice BF, we might have to just polish those off. That would make for a very interesting BF hunt. If you hear rumors of a bunch of women arrested by the Apache Police, it was probably us and the damned brownies.

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  55. Yeah, that's pretty much every trip with me at the helm. The girls don't know what I'm going to do next. I like to wing it and just go with how the mood of the place feels and what insane stuff I can make up. It's more likely we'd be arrested for skinny dipping than eating hemp brownies and if we get caught doing both at the same time, that was not my idea--one of the gals came up with that one. I prefer to enjoy my decadence one experience at a time, so as to not take away from the experience.

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  56. Yeah...guess if I had to choose one over the other around you guys, it would be the skinnydipping (hee)

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  57. Hahaha. Julie and I are taking a road trip in early April and it's going to be so fun. I plan to do some insanely weird photos and maybe some video hosting along the way to these strange places up north. No one knows what we'll do next on the road trip, but I'm pretty sure I'd like to at some point on the blog do something with a live twitter dare where when we're on a trip, put a photo of where we are and let people tweet dares and do one of them and get a pic or video of it. I think it'd be cool to do something interactive.

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  58. I would so love to see that. An interactive game of truth or dare. Ever have any interesting experiences playing that game?

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  59. You know, no one ever wanted to play it with me when I was growing up. They always wanted to play spin the bottle. Hee hee

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  60. Ah, well...you've missed out on the most intriguing psychological game...some people think they can skate if they just pick truth all the time--but the questions can get so pointed and personal (you have to SWEAR tell the truth at the beginning of the game) that they will risk doing a dare...that's when it really gets interesting!

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  61. So, can you think of any truths and any dares you would draw the line with? I know I'd answer any truth because I'm painfully upfront.

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  62. Wow...I'm more likely to do any kind of dare than spill the beans about SOME stuff--haha. Somebody once dared me to get naked and go over and bang around on my drum set, so I did.

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  63. Sounds like a Matthew McConnaughey moment. My ex was a drummer in a band and my son plays drums. I lived with two drummers. Can you imagine? I wasn't losing my mind, but it was close. Drummers are awesome athletes and they are what keeps the whole band moving on course, but I swear when a drummer plays a song, you have no freaking clue what song he's playing when there's no other instruments. Even after 26 years of living with drums--still couldn't tell what songs they were. I tried to learn one time because I dance hip hop and I type very fast so I figured I could coordinate it. My shins could not take the bass drum pedal. Ow! The burning!!!

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  64. Interesting stuff...I just banged around on them because I was a radio deejay and always loved music!

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  65. Oh, how fun! I think it would be great to just be able to work off the cuff and yuck it up on radio. That'd be fun. I hate my voice though. I think I'm annoying. I bet you had some pretty weird stuff go on while doing that, dead air time and guests not showing up and stuff like that.

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  66. It was a pretty wild life at times...won't elaborate too much, but it pays to have a few really long songs to put on...like the sixteen minute version of In-A-Gadda-Da- Vida!!!

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  67. Yeah. I like Nights in White Satin myself. So, what's the weirdest job you ever had? One time, I modeled as a mannequin. I thought that was the freakiest thing to do and I actually did not crack a smile. I was a good little mannequin. You learn to look up so you don't notice the people looking at the store window or you'd get distracted.

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  68. That's gotta take some real steadiness...guess you couldn't go to work as a mannequin if you had a hangover!!!
    I did mostly radio and TV...I did the news on TV in Puerto Rico...I'd hang around the pool all day, then go in and do the news at night. I had to wear a coat and tie, but the viewers could only see you from about the shoulders up, so I'd be wearing the jacket and tie up top and my shorts and sandals on the bottom!

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  69. I like that. It would have been funny if they had a guest on who wanted you to demonstrate an exercise and you stood up and forgot you had shorts on. I didn't mind the mannequin gig. I kind of wanted to do nude modeling for art classes because whenever I took life drawing classes, I'd envy the models to just get up there and do insanely weird poses and then walk around in a robe and see how everyone sketched you from their different angles. I think it would actually help a woman's self perception to realize that only she sees herself with magnifying glasses, everyone else has different interpretations.

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  70. Gotta have a lot of self-confidence to do that gig--I imagine you do. Anyway, if you ever decide to do that--let me know where to sign up for the class!!!

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  71. Hahaha. I'd have to drink a quart of gin or something nasty like that to do it now. It's bad enough displaying that for a man when you're in your late 40s.

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  72. For a blind sculpture perhaps. hee hee
    I did make a goal for myself to wear this damned obscene bikini I purchased and pose for a pic in the desert and put it on the blog. Don't know if I'll get brave enough or skinny enough to do it, but the suit is hanging up taunting me and I get very determined when I'm dared.

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  73. Okay--just for the record: I DARE YA!!!

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  74. Yeah, that helps. I tried it on when I got it, but all my bits and pieces are falling out of it. It will take a very determined workout regime. Gonna have to bump it up to 2 hours a day to get there for summer. What are you doing with the summer? Most folks flood out of AZ to San Diego and Rocky Point or Flag. Are you one of them?

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  75. No, I'm one of those hardy (or foolhardy) folks who sticks around. Wouldn't mind a break, though, in any of those places. You?

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  76. My ex was a vacation nazi. We'd go every few years and my son referred to it as the "hostage situation" which was pretty accurate. No joy in it. He was all weird about schedules and doing this and that and commanding the whole thing and would rather die than admit he was lost and make us drive around forever lost in some part of town--it was like that scene in European Vacation when they got stuck in the roundabout all day and Chevy kept saying "Look Big Ben!" over and over again. I did go on my first single vacation in my entire life in December. It was magical! I went to San Diego. My son and his fiancee went but I put them in a room far from me so I could have privacy. My ex would make our son share our room every single vacation--even when he was grown. Ugh! Mostly, I just do road trips with my gal pals because it sucks getting time off work. It's like a sweat shop. It takes me over a month to save up a day off.

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  77. Ha...I'm one of those guys too proud==or stubborn--to ask for directions too. But your Tom Toms and such should theoretically keep you from ever getting lost these days. I just haven't gotten one yet.
    The thing about vacations is that they are real work...coordinating transportation and schedules and arranging accommodations and lugging all your crap around...how can anyone call that a vacation?

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  78. Ha...I'm one of those guys too proud==or stubborn--to ask for directions too. But your Tom Toms and such should theoretically keep you from ever getting lost these days. I just haven't gotten one yet.
    The thing about vacations is that they are real work...coordinating transportation and schedules and arranging accommodations and lugging all your crap around...how can anyone call that a vacation?

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  79. Whoops, didn't mean to repeat myself.

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  80. I'm in agreement with that, plus I really hate flying and now you're forced to make it an all day event, between getting to the airport, parking, taking buses, checking in by yourself--I freaking suck at that-getting through the guards--they always pick on me--then the waiting, waiting, waiting and by the time you get there, you go through the luggage/rental car/hotel shit. I get home from it just to do laundry and relax finally. It kind of sucks being in AZ just because you can't hop to other states so easily. I grew up in DC and you could just go to Philly or NY or the Boardwalk in no time and it was such a pleasant drive visually. Here, it's like a scene out of "Hills Have Eyes" and I'm always certain my car will break down. The next biggest city is LA--6 hour drive. Damn!

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  81. You mean Casa Grande is not big enough for you?
    I spent a few days in DC some years back--I kinda liked that town. What I really loved (beside the Smithsonian)was the Phillips Collection art museum. All these amazing works. I remember looking at just one wall and there was like a Picasso, a Van Gogh, a Monet, a Cezanne, a Degas...all right in there in front of me. I was duly impressed by that place.

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  82. Yeah. I was spoiled growing up. We went to the museums all the time and all the important places of our govt and I took it for granted. Even saw King Tut display when it was there. I was deeply fascinated with theaters and museums growing up. Took 6 years of acting just to be in the theater working the lights and the makeup and the costumes and loving the smell and feel of it and the same thing with my love of museums. In fact, as much of an awful movie as it was, I loved that Nicholas Cage movie "National Treasure" and I always wanted to be an egyptologist. I still have a freaky thing for safari clothing and the movie "The Mummy." I'm a romantic at heart, I guess. I came to AZ in 77 and I have to say that it was a shock--just a few high rises downtown and really no culture whatsoever. It's still not that impressive culturally and I wish it was more liberal and new age like Tucson. It's so damned Intel, uptight conservative with yuppies and trophy wives and the old Scottsdale money. I just so do not fit in here.

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  83. Geez...I came here in '77 as well. And museums are about my favorite places in the world.
    Yeah, don't know how you deal with with all those looney tunes up there. You should be in Tucson.

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  84. I wanted to go to Portland but my son's fiancee doesn't like it. Then, I thought about going east again to be near family and friends because I've always felt alone out here in the west, but I'm not sure I fit in there anymore. I'm more Sheryl Crow-ish and I don't know if I'd fit in. There's a few artsy type places here and there, so maybe I could find a place for me, but at this age, I wonder how I'd handle the icy winters. I do miss the seasons and the rain so much and trees and grass and woods, but I find myself stuck in AZ at least 5 more years. In an ideal world, I'd be a writer full-time and just be able to travel around when it gets miserable here and go to a cabin in the mountains and write for a few months and then come home and feel like I had both worlds.

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  85. With all of its weather related drawbacks, (seems always too hot or a bit too cold) I still enjoy the stark beauty of the desert. I think it gets in your blood--or not--and so you have some people loving it and others wishing they were someplace else. But hey, you can always go to Flag to get a real taste of winter and the pines if you want.

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  86. Hey Autumn, just weighing in on the vacation thing...Our family definitely likes to travel, but we've also come to realize that there's something to be said for the "staycation" as well. Sometimes its nice just to have the time off without the planning, the schedule, the budget, "OMG, We're going to miss the flight", "If we buy a bunch of XYZ at WalMart before we leave we won't spend as much on XYZ when we're there", "Shit, gas is expensive here", and finally, the dreaded getting-back-Sunday-at-six-and-having-to-be-at-work-the-next day lag.

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  87. Yeah. It's not really the same for me. I didn't grow up in pine country, but in deciduous. The White Mountains feel a lot like where I grew up, but the problem with AZ is the same thing I found when I came here the one route to go north becomes a bloody mess because it's like 2 lanes climbing high and one accident and the whole thing shuts down. Now, one time I went up on the mountain down there and climbed around in Peppersauce cave. Can't remember, Mt. Lemmon? Yeah, that was it. I heard it's green up higher on it. Not sure if that's true, but you have a little microclimate down there which is nice. I wish South Mountain were twice its height and it might produce weather like your mountains. I envy that in monsoon season. Where I am, we get Tucson's leftover storms.

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  88. Bleaux;
    I'm with you! I'm taking a vacation at the end of the month and the beginning of the next one and I'm going to just luxuriate in the pool, do some grilling, hike around, shoot some baskets, go to a drive-in, totally play and have fun without any travel hassles.

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  89. Leftovers...that's cute. Yes, it's just a hop skip and a jump to Mt. Lemmon from here, and the higher up you go, the greener it gets. There's the village of Summerhaven at the top--very quaint--and some interesting hiking trails--and so much cooler in the summer. I don't know what people around here would do without that kind of safety valve...I guess they'd eventually go crazy like the legislators in Phoenix!!!

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  90. Hey, so true! I can't even talk about the politics in AZ when we're worried about whether folks can have the "God given right to carry a gun into a bar, dammit!" (said like a kicker in boots and hat), I simply can't understand it. We did once have a liberal democrat lesbian governor, or did I just imagine that??? I still marvel how that happened in this state. I do envy the mountains down there. I just look at them and shake my head. My buddy lives at the base of some near Oro Valley--is that the Catalinas? I can't remember. Well, the view from his home is amazing but the storms that gather around the mountains in the summertime--lucky bastard. And, he got that snow there not that long ago. I never went to Summerhaven. I have to see that. I want to go to the Biosphere too. Got a to-do list!

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  91. Hee hee...I felt that Napolitano deserted us just for the sake of having a high profile job--but she doesn't really do anything in that job but make excuses. She's the one who left us in the clutches of Brewer. By the way, the reason she got elected is that she carried Pima county by a huge margin! There is a movement afoot here to secede from Arizona and become our own state (or country?)It's serious (supposedly)because Baja Arizona is as different as night and day from Maricopa county. I'd like to see that.

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  92. Oh, I like that, can y'all take Ahwatukee with you? Yeah, I miss Napalitano. She was great as a governor but the peter principle...I want to see the damned high speed train to Tucson. The drive is a super drag and it always has dust blowing and people wrecking right and left--why do they wreck on a straight freaking highway? I will never understand the stupidity. Now, if AZ could claim a bit of baja so we had some ocean to our state, then I'd be happy because I am not a gal who is going to cross the border for any reason, no how. You know, I think I know where I'd live if I could pick anywhere--probably around Medford Oregon or extreme Northern CA. It's perfect weather wise and some ocean not far away and some seasons. Yes, I think I just answered the "where would I live" puzzle.

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  93. Oregon probably is ideal when you factor in climate--not too bad--and proximity to the ocean. And some progressive minded folks.

    Maybe they wreck on the drive from Tucson to Phoenix because it's boring and they fall asleep.

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  94. Truly, I think it's the monotomy of the drive that makes them doze. The winds are pretty strong too which freaks them out. I can't tell you how many times, I drive on a perfectly clear day and so much sand blows, I'm soon unable to see and I have a tumbleweed caught under the car. One time, I dragged the dame thing all the way to Tucson. Haha

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  95. Driiifting along with the tumbling tumbleweeeed...

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  96. Seriously. It was freaking embarrassing. It was hooked to the front of the car and sticking up like a pair of steer horns on a Texas Cadillac. I keep telling Julie that on one of our treks to abandoned places, we have to get pics of tumbleweeds since they fascinate the easterners.

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  97. Yes, that's the classic image of the southwest that I think easterners see. Plus I know some of them still think we live in teepees out here.

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  98. When I moved here, I thought there'd be hitching posts and I was shocked to see orange trees. The first ones I saw, I pointed and said, "what is that growing on those trees?" The native who was driving us around laughed. "Oranges, dear." I had never known they could grow in the desert and had never seen an orange tree in DC. It was so exotic! Dates on palm trees--exotic! The first rain here, I thought it was the nastiest smell in the world and then I got to where I thought creosote is a wonderful smell. I was dumb enough to rush outside for a dust storm when I first moved here. Next few months--sick to death with valley fever. Oh, I was the sickest I've ever been. I was delirious. Don't remember much of it except I got down to 100 pounds on my 5'8" frame. Ouch! Tumbleweeds fascinate me. I'd like to steal one and use it as art in my apartment. I'm hoping to do some grave rubbings on my next road trip and take a nice one and attach it to a fake Halloween headstone and then attach some withered dead flowers to the bottom of it like a real headstone and hang it on the wall. Yeah, I'm a bit of a freak. So, tell me, last week you were a new bachelor, did you party all week to celebrate or just relax without someone into your business? Come on, there's an upside to breaking up. Freedom.

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  99. I didn't party...just sort of quietly reflecting. Yes, the idea of freedom is sort of life affirming...but it seems the purpose of the freedom is to get back into a situation where there isn't so much freedom again...only a better match-up this time LOL

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  100. True. I grew up in a big family and married a man with a big family so I had been around family forever. I have to admit, I miss the family the most. I just love having people to care for and who care for me and have holidays and laughter and gathering around when things are tough. I have an enormous heart and it always needs a place to be. The nights are the worst though. I admit to fighting bedtime like a child. I run the TV on the timer, run the fan loudly, anything to feel less alone. I have to admit, though, about the last 10 or so years of the marriage, I was so angry with him that sleeping beside the enemy was not easy. I would wear myself down before going in to sleep when he had been asleep for hours. I'd lay there wide awake and couldn't figure out why I was so uncomfortable and couldn't sleep. I just had no outlet for the anger. Now, I lay there just thinking how sad it is to have no one to say goodnight to who says it back. I don't mind being in a relationship. This 6 months has been the first time since I was 16 I was without a man in my life, so it's been good for me. I've learned I can count on myself and I don't NEED a man, but I'd LIKE one. That's a huge difference. A lot of women I know go bonkers without a man as if he arrives and suddenly you have a purpose. I guess I get that when women are in their breeding years but now what I expect in my man has nothing to do with being a good father but being a good companion.

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  101. That must have felt strange at first...having lived basically your whole adult life in a relationship...and then kind of like being dropped off in the middle of nowhere and having to get your bearings again. I've had a number of relationships, but when one ends it's still the same kind of feeling for a while--even though you know in your logical mind that you are better off...but the heart and the mind are two different things.

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  102. I admit that I had no trouble at all walking away from him. I had nothing but fear for him. I still do. If he has to call me like he did today to tell me that he didn't want to do our taxes jointly, I felt that sinking going to the principal's office feeling. Fear, dread, ice water in my stomach and I felt that with him for a very long time. So, leaving him was a huge liberating relief, but being without family is tough. I work from home too, so it's very lonely. My friends live all over town and I get to see them maybe every few weeks. My son and his fiancee are buying a house about 6 miles away and they're very busy--remember the 20s? Well, it makes me think about this crazy life I'm being given. I used to grieve not picking where I live, but now I'm still kind of at my son and his fiancee's mercy. I don't want to miss out on grandkid(s). I never had grandparents. Mine were all born in the 1800s--yes--they were old having my parents who were old having me. Well, I figure the best of both worlds is to be able to travel but have a home here. I will see. Time has a way of changing the whole game plan. I do miss the family I have left. I need to make a trip east. My sister is very ill and frail and the other brother and sister I love have passed on and the brother I have nothing to do with will end up being the only sibling I'm left with--ick! I have other relatives in the east too that I adore, so it would be nice to see them. I haven't seen them since 2005. I had to fight my ex to go there and visit because I told him my sister was dying. He was like "she's not dying!" We went and visited and I knew it. I had a great visit with her. A month later, she passed. I hate having that kind of insight, but I'm also glad I do. I type too freaking fast. I'm giving you novels to read.

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  103. Nice to have this kind of insight into you--I like people who are willing to open up...
    I don't have any family, so it's been a much different experience for me. Parents and an older sister have all passed. Lost track of any of the "minor" players, such as cousins.

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  104. So, you know what that's like, being a bit adrift, like a person without a country. Of course, I fill my life with lots of people who are chosen family, but I grew up with a lot of huge gatherings and traditions and so it's weird but kind of exciting too. I must admit, not having my parents around means no one to disappoint or to continue to gauge how well I'm doing or how much I'm screwing up. I get to be the real me. There's always something good in things that are bad. I can't think of a single time that isn't so. Sometimes, having those loved ones around keeps you locked in a role and a period in time. When I went back when my mom was dying, my siblings immediately went into their roles in the family and I found myself being the baby of the family again, the one who entertains and makes people smile and laugh and never gets into trouble and lets the others make the decisions. When you're not around your family, you can be who you really are as an adult. That's pretty cool. So, I'm guessing your friends are going to be fixing you up in no time. You want to hear something funny? When I was preparing to tell my ex I wanted a divorce, I thought I better see if I could get any attention out there at all. I know about age-ism in the male species. So, I put myself up on a singles site and in an hour 30 guys had rushed to respond and were prodding and pushing and being very aggressive and really nasty. I took my name off right away. One guy said, "you say here you want to email a guy first before meeting and yet you say you want an affectionate guy. How the hell can I be affectionate if I can't freaking see you?" Whoa! Well, I learned I could easily get strange men to meet me in bars. Ick! I put up a post on my blog "would you date me?" and people were so nice. One blogger I'd been secretly crushing on responded and I was thrilled. I like the idea of getting to know someone over time online first and then meet them. I know why a guy in a bar would want to date me--he either likes redheads or boobs, but it's cool to get to know someone without them knowing you're shopping for date and then work towards that. I also like that bloggers have a home online. You've been reading them a while, getting to know them. Of course, our issue is always distance. My crush is in San Diego. Oh, jeez, I forgot! You know the hunting females we talked about last week? I wrote the post. It goes up Sunday afternoon. I give you credit with a link to your blog. It was a fun idea for a post and I got to write insider tips about women and our "mysteries."

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  105. I did the singles dating site thing too. In comparison, while men are slobbering all over themselves to email a message to a "pretty picture," the women are more cautious, and more selective because, like you, all they have to do is sit back and field the offers. Whereas the men have to work at it a little more.

    Looking forward to your post on Sunday, and thanks for the link. Hoping to learn something more about the mysterious female psyche...truly a life-long educational process for us poor slobs known as men.

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  106. Ah, I seriously doubt you have any trouble with the pursuit of the female species. We only seem complicated because we're taught to not ask for things straight out but hope that those in charge pick up on our needs and take care of them. Our purpose is one as caretaker, nurse, cook, lover, but not usually on that list includes fighter of intruders, seekers of status and wealth or manager of the grunts. So, we seem complicated because we are passive aggressive by nature. Oops, just gave away another secret. The reason I like men so much is that they are who they are. They simply say it like it is and I appreciate not having to dance around them trying to figure out what's inside and what the motives are.

    So, yeah, the dating thing was really kind of scary. You just never know if you'll get some dude who might be controlling and not take a breakup well. I used to have a stalker in CA, so the thought of someone obsessed is unnerving. I feel the same way about meeting a guy in a bar. I mean, he comes with no references. At least in blog world, you know a little about him by his blog. I always thought I'd have friends or relatives hook me up because the guy would at least have someone who knows him who I know and so it's not like they dropped out of the sky onto my lap with a questionable past. But, single men in my age group--not such an easy find. I considered for a while what it would be like to enjoy a boy toy. After all, I'm a vibrant woman and having someone at the ready would be fun, especially because my ex was a fuddy duddy. But, seriously, I don't want to be talking about Eric Clapton and have him ask if he went to school with me or was an old chum. Seriously, a guy with experience is worth a helluva lot. I think guys have it easier because they can date any age range and it's okay, but for me, it'd have to be someone within 5 years or else it looks like I'm a gold digger or a cougar. Oh damn! Didn't realize it's so late. I want to finish the discussion but I work tomorrow. Damned medical field! It's flu season so workload is worse than usual. I want to hear more from you. You are a most interesting person and a prize new friend! G'night, Timoteo or should I just call you Tim?

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  107. Either one is okay, whatever you like to call me. Yeah, me eyes getting a little droopy too. Quite nice to do this one on one thing with you tonight. Okay, let's talk later, and I'll be reading you tomorrow!!!
    G'night.

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  108. that was, as they say, back in the day ;) lol

    'course, given a reason to... :O

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  109. Late to the party, as usual.

    And wow to the hair. When I first saw the closeup of the vacuum on the youtube clip, I thought it would be making fun of dogs/cats being afraid of the appliance. But wow... 24 inches? *insert mind-in-gutter comment here*

    I spent yesterday doing 'tennage date' night. My girl and I snuck into the movie theater with some booze in a flask, and made out like we were 15. Fun times.

    I even got to 3rd base! Woo!! Wait til I tell all my buds in the locker room on Monday!

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  110. L.I.I.; I'm hearing that song, "livin' on the edge" by Aerosmith stuck in my head now imaging you getting into so much mischief. I got in trouble once for taking in a root beer because it was in a bottle that looked like a beer bottle and someone narc'd on me. Oh brother! How embarrassing. That's like on my honeymoon I was carded in Vegas for ordering a Coke. They figured if I bought a Coke in a casino, I was underage. I was 21! Now, let me get the official length on my hair..Wow! I was close--it's 25!

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