Saturday, August 21, 2010

Halloween candy = how much sex

(This is a reprint for those who missed this important information and with everyone already getting the Halloween bug, it's something to consider with the upcoming season)

Yeah, it’s one of those days when Autumnforest goes a little bit nuts. I had one thought, that begat another thought and then another… You get the idea.(You really don’t want to know the delicate workings of my brain, just sit back and appreciate the illogical trail it leaves when it’s burned a zigzag path through useless information).

I was casually wondering about the calories in Halloween candy and then, since I'm strictly dieting, I wondered how is the best way to work it off. Then, I thought about how chocolate is the love medicine for women. So, how much sex would it take to burn off those fun-sized bars???

(Fun sized bars):

Snickers (80 calories) 15 minutes of foreplay followed by *10 minutes of intercourse

Milky Way (75 calories) 15 minutes of kissing followed by *7 minutes of intercourse

Baby Ruth (85 calories) 15 minutes of kissing followed by *5 minutes of foreplay followed by *10 minutes of intercourse

Tootsie Pop (60 calories) *10 minutes of intercourse

Reese’s cup (44 calories) *7 minutes of intercourse OR 20 minutes of foreplay

M&M fun sized bag (99 calories) *15 minutes of intercourse or 45 minutes of foreplay

1 roll Smarties (25 calories) 15 minutes of kissing

*You can half your intercourse time if you use the doggy style position because it burns twice as many calories (wink).

Now, considering the amount of candy one typically finishes off while waiting for the little boogers to knock at the door, it seems Halloween should be accompanied by bottles of Viagra and a crate of KY jelly on the Halloween display stand in the stores.

Warning: Enjoy in moderation (the candy, not the sex!)


  1. For a roll of smarties not much sex though. Love smarties. Kids
    are addicted to Pez type, they've been around for 50 years or so and you can collect dispencers for those candies.

  2. Echo;
    My son collects pez dispensers. They are so cool. I am a Smarties gal myself, but I love kissing, so I might need to eat like a dozen of those packages.



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