Friday, June 5, 2009

Erotic Excerpt From My Manuscript "The Thicket"

I probably should put a warning on it that this excerpt is an erotic scene, please be mature if you're reading this. I chose a scene that was erotic enough to entice but not as rated X as some of the other scenes. I didn't want to offend anyone too much. Erotic horror is a strange breed to write because much of the anticipation and climaxes are similar in a good fright and a good sexual encounter. At least, one hopes.

This scene is about the Esbat, or full moon night. This pagan community on the mountaintop has their own way of observing such earth-based spirituality, a culmination of a couple centuries of isolated practice and Celtic origins.

Our heroine, Ivy, the inexperienced 25-year-old woman who just joined the community to claim her place as the last McBride female, is about to get an eyeful tonight. Admittedly, this scene is as-written without editing, but should give you a feel for the way the erotica is incorporated into the manuscript.


What was it the elder Joshua had said about Esbat’s?

“When the weather is good, everyone is outside for Esbat. Under the full moon we show our devotion to each other beneath the energy of its light. It blesses our unions. It’s believed that lovers must not play at love beneath the moon. It must be genuine. Any show of affection, any sign of attachment is a declaration before the moon, a formal gesture of bonding with a powerful witness. If there is no spiritual connection between the two and they are only out for lust, then they are destined to never find true love.”

Ivy studied the full moon casting an enormous fluorescent glow to the mountaintop outside her bedroom window. The sound of voices murmuring caught her attention through the open window. She bent down and studied the two figures by the neighboring duck pond. Ian and Chloe were together. The bluish cast of the moon’s glow washed over their naked bodies. Ian was standing, legs apart, huge fists wrapped in Chloe’s long hair. She was on her knees before him with Ian in an obvious position of domination, but her hands were on his narrow hips, a glimpse of voluntary submission.

Ivy turned away breathlessly. She knew what the couple was doing. She might be inexperienced in actually doing these things, but she wasn’t uneducated about sex. In fact, she’d always read a great deal of erotic books and looked at art magazines in hopes of understanding why her body wanted such encounters, but her mind wouldn’t allow her to let go.

Restlessly, she went downstairs, slipped her sneakers on, threw a towel around her neck and worked her way through the ancient oaks toward the roadway. A good brisk swim in Becca’s pond would help her get some rest.

Just as she was about to emerge onto the road, Ivy saw a tall figure heading towards the corner co-op store. She hid behind a tree and watched as Jack hiked down the road, a towel slung over his shoulder. He wasn’t heading to Becca and Quentin’s pond where he usually swam. The only other swimming pond was in the clearing.

It was the Esbat. What did a lone man do on such a night? It was supposed to be a night for lovers. Did he have someone he was seeing? Someone in the clearing near the pond?


Ivy couldn’t stop her curiosity or her rising jealousy. She crept behind one of the oak trees to see him stop in the roadway, turn towards Chloe and Ian to watch for a moment. He ran a hand through his thick hair and turned away, walking up towards the store. Ivy followed quietly along the side of the roadway shaded by trees. Jack stopped at the store, turned and watched a few moments, then walked away to Ian’s north pasture and over the crest of it to the other side out of view.

Was he meeting someone? A tryst? No, not a tryst. It would have to be serious. Even Jack wouldn’t defy the Esbat guidelines and play around in the moonlight. That thought made her feel ill. She had no claims on him, but Ivy admitted to herself she hoped to. She followed mindlessly towards the store, wanting to know and not wanting to know where he was headed and, even worse, what he was doing.

The sound of male voices startled Ivy and she stopped and pivoted near the store, searching the shadows where Jack had been watching. In the arbor that attached to the store’s side there were two powerful males, one backed up against the wall, the other pinning him down in a stance of aggression. They were both breathing hard as if in a struggle to lead. For a moment she was certain a fight was ensuing. Ivy stepped forward to interrupt when she realized it was Maverick and Duncan. Duncan’s fair blonde curls could be seen, his slender agile body backed against the wall. Maverick’s dark head created a shield from what his mouth was doing to Duncan’s neck. The younger man’s head was tilted back, allowing full access for his husband.

The sight of two handsome and virile men challenging each other for dominance was arousing, like seeing two ancient wrestlers fighting a dual for power. Duncan grunted and thrust Maverick back against the post of the arbor, shaking the entire wisteria structure.

“No teeth!” Duncan snarled.

“Sorry,” Maverick responded sheepishly.

The hole in the arbor allowed the moonlight to wash their bodies in its glow, making a strange spotlight effect on them. They were both bare on the top, wearing jeans and bare feet below. Duncan slid his tongue teasingly up Maverick’s sternum, making the powerful man let out a groan of impatience before grasping him by the arms and pulling him to his chest for a kiss that was brutally hungry. The men dug their hands into each other’s hair and tilted their heads, pressing further into the post, every muscle taut with preparedness.

A rush of warmth spread through Ivy’s pelvis and her heartbeat quickened in anticipation of something so erotic that she too would feel a sexual satisfaction just from viewing. It was like no other encounter she’d ever imagined. These two athletic men were struggling for something more than just a sexual hunger, but something deeper, marking their territory and somehow branding each other. It was nearly competitive in its fervor.

It was only a matter of time before they broke their embrace and would be facing her. She backed up slowly, her foot snapping a twig. Ivy stilled herself, held her breath, and closed her eyes.

“You can’t join us, Ivy, but you can watch.” Duncan laughed.

“I’m sorry. I was going for a walk and I heard something.” She blushed.

Maverick grasped Duncan’s hand and pulled him from under the arbor and out into the moonlight where Ivy stood feeling like a naughty child caught peeking into the boys’ bathroom.

“Your first Esbat?” Maverick studied her with his dark knowing eyes.

She nodded.

“You look a bit lost.” He observed.

“I am, actually. I’m not sure if I’m supposed to be outside on the full moon. It seems everyone is paired up.”

Duncan chuckled. “There’s a place for everyone up here, Ivy. You know that by now. Those who aren’t committed are over there in the field where there’s open moonlight.” He nodded across the road to where Jack had disappeared.

“Why didn’t anyone tell me?” She asked.

“Perhaps you’re not ready yet.” Maverick observed. “You’ve shown by birth and blood that you’re pagan, by your ties to the earth that you are bound to nature, and yet you have not fed the animal part of your being.” The wise man stated.

“The animal part?” She asked in wonder. Was this the missing part Chloe believed she needed to become complete and claim her supposed inherent powers as a McBride female?

Sexuality.” Maverick explained. “Don’t you get it, Ivy? Until you own your body, your spirit has no home.”

“Oh.” It seemed rather obvious by this night’s display just what was missing from the puzzle of her life on the mountaintop and her part in this pagan community.

“Go.” Maverick waved towards the pasture. “Exposure yourself to the moon’s scrutiny. Let it see your soul and understand your true wishes and desires. You can energize your sexuality in the moonlight even without a partner.” He told her. “Go follow Jack. That is what you were doing, right?”

She felt her face go up in flames. “Thanks.” There was no use in pretending she wasn’t following Jack. The men retreated to the wisteria arbor.

As she stepped up over the embankment to crest the hill, Ivy stopped and thought a moment. Did she want to know what they were doing? Was she ready to possibly join them? What would a person alone on the Esbat do? They couldn’t play with one another, logic told her, as they believed that would keep them from ever finding love.

Knowing that couldn’t be the case, she gathered her bravery and took the last few steps to look out over the moonlit pasture in wonder.

It wasn’t like anything she’d ever imagined seeing. There were perhaps a dozen people over the two acres of rolling pastureland. Each was lying on a towel completely naked, dotting the hillside, spread out randomly from each other as if it were coincidental that they ended up there. Their eyes were closed, their faces upturned, basking in the moonlight like sun worshippers on some exotic beach.

She pivoted to turn and leave when her eyes caught sight of all 6’3” of Jack Sinclair spread out on a towel not five yards away from her on the right. She hungrily ran her eyes over every detail of him. Joshua the elder had called the full moon “the great equalizing light.” Looking at the bloodless scene, she understood what he meant. Even Jack’s tan couldn’t be discerned, nor the color of his hair. He was nondescript and yet at the same time more defined than ever. The moonlight cast dips and hollows between his muscles amplifying their contrasts. She knew he was extraordinary but never imagined she’d see her first naked man in full view in such a manner. She had seen his backside when he dove into the pond, but had never seen him fully until now.

He appeared to be asleep, both arms strewn out onto the soft grass, his breathing regular. She drank in the sight of his mighty chest rising and falling, sprinkled with hairs. His massive arms defined by his woodworking were braided with thick muscles even in repose. It was his narrow hips and long legs that drew her eyes downward, but it was the nest of auburn hairs and his resting thick manhood that made her stop breathing. Ivy’s fingers curled into her palm tightly, wishing to know what it felt like, what the changes were as it became aroused.

Good God! Would it get even larger than that?
She took a step back and turned to leave.


She wished away the sound of Jack’s voice.

“You’re joining us?”

She tried not to look right at him, but just above him as he sat up on his elbow and studied her in the moonlight.

“Lay your towel out here. Near me.” He told her, patting the ground.

Is it impolite to run away when offered a spot in the field on a full moon’s night?

“Thank you.” She took her time spreading the towel out next to him. “D-do I need to do anything special?” She asked, refusing to look at him.

“Just take off your clothes.” He explained. “I usually lay here and soak up the moonlight a good half hour to an hour.”

“Do you meditate?” She asked as she took even more time removing her sneakers.

“The moon is for renewing our sexual energy. I usually enjoy some fantasy thoughts. Some people pleasure themselves. Sometimes I do.” His voice lowered huskily.

She could barely gather a breath at the imagery that brought to mind. What kind of sounds did he make when he pleasured himself? What did he fantasize about? Her mind was so distracted, Ivy forgot what she was supposed to be doing. She stared down at the towel as if it were a foreign object she didn’t recognize.

He chuckled. “Come on. It’s not that bad. Lay down, close your eyes like I do.” He laid back and closed his eyes, offering her the ideal time to remove her clothing.

Ivy peeled her clothes off so fast there was no time to take back the decision. Taking a deep breath, she lay back on the towel near him and closed her eyes. It wasn’t so bad now. She sank into the towel with a strange feeling of liberation. Only two weeks into this place and she was lying naked in a field of other naked people. Where on earth could people do things like this and make it feel so normal? She felt strangely empowered and proud of herself. A month ago the thought of this would have prevented her from moving to this mountaintop and finding these amazing people and a place for herself in the world that had waited for her 25 years to arrive and claim it.

“It’s nice, isn’t it?” He asked her softly.

“Yeah.” She agreed.

Moonlight on skin felt different. It was less intrusive than the sun, less permeating, more subtle, like a comforting gentle hand on a fevered brow.

They lay there in silence a long time. She tried to put fantasies in her mind, but every time she did, her body blushed warmly because the object of her fantasies was beside her. Perhaps 10 minutes of thinking had brought her to a more meditative state because Ivy felt as if her body was heavy and her limbs were no longer a part of her.

She sighed softly and then Jack’s fingers tickled hers. She tilted her head and looked over. He studied her, his palm open in an offering, his brow raised questioningly. She instinctively placed her hand inside his and he grinned and then tilted his head back and closed his eyes with what sounded like a sigh of relief.

Ivy studied the moon’s bright light with a smile as she felt Jack’s thumb unconsciously rubbing the back of her hand. It wasn’t until she realized the questioning look in his eyes that Jacob’s words came back to her and her heart soared.

“Any show of affection, any sign of attachment is a declaration before the moon. A formal gesture of bonding with a powerful witness.”


  1. Exquisite … uhm, this isn't autobiographical, is it, Autumn? Your writing excells at the clarity of the moment, the senses that go BEYOND the senses. you're a natural for the erotic/horror genre.

    Oh, hey … that reminds me There's another blog that you might already know about for cool ckicks jus' like you … right here!

    Lookin' forward to adding this magnificent "The Thicket" to my library,
    Anadæ Effro (•:-)}

  2. Anadæ;
    You'll get a signed copy from the author. You know, writing is just like channeling for me. Being psychic helps me a helluva lot in articulating events. There's absolutely nothing in the scene that I've ever experienced (more's the pity), but I can place myself in this magical location with the elements that empower the mountain and the people and I've created a world that I can jump in and out of and know what the folks would be doing by a kind of empath's abilities. Of course, there's always bits of people I know in each character. That's probably what makes them so believable. We all know someone who's like Maverick (the wise brooding intellectual) or Ian (the demanding leader who believes he's always right). And poor Ivy. I understand her lack of feeling that the world accepted her in when she was born and was glad she arrived and I understand her ties to nature and skepticism, and loss of family ties, but I have to reach back to adolescence to understand her lack of presence in her body and the awkwardness. I'm so glad you enjoyed it. I love tying in those pagan elements into humanity so that they apply to everyone and not just the characters in this magical place. I hope others walk away going, "do I honor the body that houses my soul???"

  3. Autumn that was SO good! You must let us know when your book is done 'cause I'm buying a copy and locking myself in my room with it lol

    Great job and I look forward to more posts :)

  4. Dolly;
    Thanks. This one is too much fun to write. I can go into that world and just go nuts. I'll certainly let everyone know once I've submitted it. I hope to have it edited and ready by Samhain. I'm already thinking ahead to the next one which will take place in Oregon City, OR. I went there one time and was so overwhelmed by how I felt there that I had an immediate idea for an erotic novel there that would be chilling. Finding locales is one of the fun parts and having knowledge of how geology and placement makes places more haunted also helps to know the "power centers" to place the stories. If I'm drawn there by every fiber of my being--it'll be a location for a novel. :-)

  5. I had to say, not all pagans are like that. I don't want people getting the impression that we are. We are more nature based. We have never done anything like that. I hadn't heard of any in person like that, except on the internet. I can't see us running around nude with a group. LOL

  6. Then try The Witches' Voice web site. Every single stratum of every Tradition discourses there, from robed to skyclad & every other ceremonial application imaginable (•:-)}

  7. Ella;
    This is a work of fiction. I consider myself well versed in paganism and the novel is meant to be about a particular group that moved to a mountaintop to perform their own kind of paganism away from the others in their culture who practiced it a different way. This is a horror novel that in the end pays homage to pagans of all kinds and portrays them in a light that is very open and accepting. Part of the charm of writing this was writing about this particular brand of pagan practices these three founding families developed because of the location they chose and the geology of the land. It's a story about someone in their group casting a dark spell and leaving them all cursed. It's a cautionary tale about sending out bad energy. I am actually a pagan myself and there's probably no one better to write this particular story because the portrayal of witches/wiccans/pagans as devil worshippers has long bothered me and this is a way to express how very honest and open they are, even this "tribe" of pagans with more erotic practices. In the context of the entire manuscript, this scene does little to explain the how's and why's of their practice, but to see them in action every day in a community on the mountaintop, you gain a strong perspective on their belief system and their gentle hearts.

  8. this is so good, how close are you to finishing? I want a copy too..

  9. Sandra;
    Thanks. I'll be submitting it in Sept/Oct. I could have gotten it done sooner but I have a long workday with medical transcription and also workout 90 minutes every single day which is a commitment I'm not willing to give up, so I end up editing at night on my laptop when I'm tired and spent from typing all day. As soon as I get it published, my promise to myself is to quit my job and write full time. I already have the second location set for the next erotic horror novel--Oregon City, Oregon. It has a hydroelectric plant on the river and the town is super moody and hidden away in the hillsides. The river is filled with sturgeon (look like sharks) and the environment, as someone who observes ideal haunted locations, is a perfect site for something powerful... :-)

  10. Wow! All these years I've been a Pagan and didn't even realize it! ;)
    But seriously, great writing!
    What's really coincidental is that, while not in the same vein, I've got some theories regarding sex and the paranormal (everything from UFOs to Bigfoot!). Still researching some things, though. (uh...don't take that last sentence the wrong way!)

  11. Thanks for the feedback. Pursue your theories. Humans have an amazing way of finding correlations--we're spatial creatures. I bet your instincts are drawing you towards an interesting conclusion. I hope you put it on your blog when you have more to report.

  12. Hey I want a copy when you are finished also Autumnforest!!! signed too-if I dont have cash -will you take some old silver coins?? yeah I am pretty broke right now-haha!! I loved it and can't wait to read more and I so enjoyed the comments also. I have been trying to write since I was in middle school-and now that i am 44 I still do not have even ONE completed short story-I love to see other people's creative efforts and wish you every success-In my opinion erotic horror is the best-and even tho I am gay -I also love reading "straight" erotic horror fiction-there is a whole series-maybe even more than one-but I know the "Hot Blood" series usually edited by Jeff Gelb is utterly fantastic (short stories)also for any gay readers the "Queer Fear" collections of short stories edited by Michael Rowe are excellent-I have two of the books 1 and 2-I do not know if any more were ever published-sadly lacking in my opinion is the series is so tilted toward gay men-lesbian voices I am sure are out there but not in this series-but other than that it is great-best to you as always Autumnforest and great work!!!

  13. Devin;
    Thanks for the feedback. There's certain opinions I really seek and you're a very intelligent person, so your opinion is pretty important. I don't think you need to worry about writing because your blog is so amazingly put together that it's obvious you have always been a writer. I used to write self-help articles published around the world and I used to scoff at being a writer. "Oh, I'm not a writer. I'm just giving advice." But, no, I was a writer every time someone read something of mine and was moved to make a change in his/her life. So, when reading your blog, you give me a new way to look at things, a new insight, a new focus, you're writing. You're transporting. You're connecting. Thanks!

  14. I gotta be honest here. My expectations were very low when I sat down to read this and now I walk away very pleasantly surprised. What a great read this was!

  15. Stephen;
    Thanks. I take that as a high compliment. You're a very intelligent man. I know it sounds strange, the mixture of eroticism and horror, but it really is a perfect complement for each other. Hopefully, I can finish getting it together and have it sent off by this autumn--my lucky time of year :-)



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